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Tuesday, July 8, 2014

On Stillness and Nests

Cleaning up the gutters and the driveway with my son, we stumbled across this nest. It was actually pitched between the outdoor light fixture and the back door, so, in my zealous cleaning frame of mind, I made a decision and removed it...before noticing a small egg still inside it. I'm sorry.
No birds were harassing me. I waited in shame for a chirping reprimand and none came. I don't know if it was abandoned a while ago or recently. Perhaps I should have listened first.

I have had this feeling a bit now... I have come up north from Miami and have a limited amount of time to get a lot done... whether cleaning up the horse barn and installing a show or repairing and maintaining my rental house, I rush headlong into it and disturb the cobwebs, the nests, the charm! And then I miss a lot of my friends and want to schedule dates with everybody. But the cell phone doesn't have service, and I can't figure out the care sharing, so I do less. Make peace with being invisible.
I think it comes down to Harmony...
This evening, I sit still and muse on whether anything I am doing really needs to be done, and whether its better to use this vacation to get to know myself or to stimulate my social instincts and to wrestle my house back from the wilderness or to get to know the wilderness inside me. Listening to a building thunderhead, watching a butterfly flit nervously from leaf to leaf outside the door, smelling dinner on the stove top, I pray for another day to arrive so I can try to do it better.

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